Sunday, February 15, 2009

The List (part 1)

Things I know there are no reason for me to get anxious over (things that are totally illogical to get anxious/panicky over):


I shouldn’t get anxious over getting dressed and leaving the apartment.

I shouldn’t be anxious about being in something other than pj’s when in the apartment.

I shouldn’t be anxious about calling people or returning phone calls.

I shouldn't be anxious about looking at emails.

I shouldn’t get anxious when people have questions or need help with something that I know the answer to or can do with little to no effort.

I shouldn’t have a panic attack over the silverware being put away incorrectly… or when the dishwasher isn’t loaded perfectly.

1 comment:

  1. Hi!

    I'm a 19-yr-old with a lot of social anxiety. I haven't been officially diagnosed with anything yet, as I'm still trying to get up the nerve to go see anyone for it...

    I shouldn't get anxious about getting less than 90 on an assignment or test, just because I think the teacher will think less of me for it. They know I'm human, and I should accept that too.

    I shouldn't get anxious just because someone disagrees with me, nor because I know many of my opinions are unpopular (feminism, woo).

    I should definitely not be so anxious about money. All I'm paying for is tuition right now. I know I can't handle retail, OK, but I'm doing just fine with in-field contract work, and will probably get a great co-op job when the time comes. Even if I magically earn no money between now and graduation, my debt load will still be pretty small. Yet I still freak out about money ALL THE TIME, because I feel like the field I'm studying in is the only one I'm really suited for. So if I can't graduate for whatever reason, I'm screwed, because nobody hires college-dropout programmers anymore.

    I shouldn't be anxious about doing group work. I've gotten perfect marks on all my labs and assignments in this one class so far, but I skipped the class Friday because I felt I couldn't handle the impending brainstorming session, which wasn't even being graded. Argh.

    I shouldn't trick myself into thinking that I've failed every assignment/test I hand in that isn't done up to my standards. I am always, always, wrong. I thought I would have to repeat Calc because I did so badly on the final, but it turns out I got an A-. I had spent so much time during the previous 3 weeks convincing myself I'd failed that I didn't believe my online transcript. I checked it every few days for the next few weeks because I thought it was an error and the administration would discover it and correct it.

    I also have the phone and email thing, too. I even have anxiety about *answering* the phone, because I usually make myself sound like an idiot.

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